I stumbled upon a wonderful article by Brene Brown, which inspired my biggest New Years’ parenting resolution: Smile each time I first see my child.

Rather than feel nit-picked, I want my sons to feel how much I love them before I give any looks of “Your shirt is tucked into your undies, again”, “Why are you under that table?” or “Get those keys out of your mouth.”

Brene’s article and parenting manifesto are inspired by an Oprah interview with Toni Morrison that shifted her thinking. Go on, you have time, watch it to blow your mind wide open.

One of Oprah’s greatest lessons in the ’90s was that everybody just wants to be appreciated or validated. She had an aha! moment in 2000 when Toni Morrison, author of The Bluest Eye, was on the show asking, “Does your face light up [when you see children]?” because that allows your face to speak how your heart feels.

Ms. Morrison’s advice is simple but deep. And Ms. Brown’s manifesto is also chock-full of encouragement to love your children for exactly who they are.

[Photo by my friend Alex Cave]